Roasting hot Christmas has gone by,
with its services and celebrations, its sports and
entertainments, its meagre feasting, and its hearty
cheer, a bloodless triumph followed by the regrettable
defeat sustained in the battle of Big Tree Fort.
To-day the Union Jack hangs limp upon the flagstaff
that rears its slender height over Nixey’s, and
the new year is some weeks old. The blue, blue
sky of January is without a single puff of cloud,
and the taint from the trenches is less sickening,
unmingled with the poisonous fumes of the lyddite
bursting-charges, and the acrid odour of smokeless
powder. It is Sunday, when Briton and Boer hold
the Truce of God, and the church-bells ring to call
and not to warn the people, and sweet Peace and blessed
Silence brood over the shrapnel-scarred veld.
The aasvogels feast undisturbed on bloated carcasses
of horses and cattle lying on the debatable ground
between the Line of Investment and the Line of Defence,
the barbel in the river leap at the flies, and partridge
and wild guinea-fowl drink in the shallows, and bathe
in the dry hot sand between the boulder-stones.
The Market Square is populous with
a chatting, sauntering crowd of people, who enjoy
the luxury of using their limbs without being called
on to displays of acrobatic agility in dodging trundling
shell. There are Irregulars and B.S.A.P., Baraland
Rifles and Town Guardsmen. There are the Native
Contingent from the stad, and a company of Zulus, and
the Kaffirs and the Cape Boys with their gaspipe rifles
that do good service in default of better, and bring
down Oom Paul’s Scripturally-flavoured denunciations
upon Englishmen, who arm black and coloured folk to
do battle for their own sable or brown or yellow rights.
These have donned odd garments and quaint bits of
finery to mark the holiday, and every white man has
indulged in the luxury of a comprehensive wash, a shave
with hot water, and a change of clothing, if it is
obtainable. Also, drooping feminine vanity revives
in hair-waves and emerges from underground burrows
of Troglodytic type, arrayed in fluttering muslins,
and crowned with coquettish hats, which walk about
in company with ragged khaki and clay-stained duck
and out-at-elbows tweed, and are proud to be seen in
its brave company.
Husbands and wives, fathers and daughters,
sons and mothers, lovers and sweethearts, meet after
the week whose separating days have seemed like weeks,
and visit the houses whose pierced walls and roofs,
that let the white-hot sunshine in through many jagged
holes, may one day, so they whisper, holding one another
closely, shelter them again in peace. Home has
become a sweet word, even to those who thought little
of home before. And many who were sinful have
found conviction of sin and the saving grace of repentance,
and many more who denied their God have learned to
know Him, in this village town of battered dwellings,
whose streets are littered with all the grim debris
of War.
Nixey’s has not come scathless
through the ordeal. The stately brick chimneys
of the kitchen and coffee-room have been broken off
like carrots, and replaced by tin funnels. Patches
of the universal medium, corrugated iron, indicate
where one of Meisje’s ninety-four-pound projectiles
recently plumped in through the soft brick of the east
wall end, and departed by the west frontage, leaving
two holes that might have accommodated a chest of
drawers, and carrying a window with it. Mrs.
Nixey, the children, and the women of the staff inhabit
a bombproof in the back-yard. The waiters have
developed a grasshopper-like nimbleness, otherwise
things go on as usual.
It being Sunday, a large long man
and another as long, but less bulky, are extended
in a couple of long bamboo chairs on Nixey’s
longish front verandah. The blue, fragrant smoke
of two long cigars curls upwards over their supine
heads, and two long drinks containing a very meagre
modicum of inferior whisky are contained in two long
tumblers, resting in the bamboo nests cunningly devised
for their accommodation in the chair-arms.
It is hot, but both the men look cool
and lazy, and almost too fresh to have spent the greater
part of the night, the younger upon advanced patrol-duty,
and the elder at the Staff bombproof in the Southern
Lines, where messages come in and where messages go
out, and where reports are received and from whence
orders are despatched from sunset to the peep of day,
and from peep of day to sunset.
The wardrobes of both warriors are
much impaired by active service, but their originally
white flannel trousers, if patched, discoloured, and
shrunken by amateur lavations, boast the cut of Bond
Street; their shirts, if a trifle ragged, are immaculately
clean, and the cracks in their canvas shoes are disguised
by a lavish expenditure of pipeclay. Beauvayse
has rummaged out and mounted a snowy double collar
in honour of the day, with a knitted silk necktie
of his Regimental colours, and a kamarband to match
is wound about his narrow, springy waist, and knotted
to perfection. Both men might be basking on an
English river-bank after a stiff pull up-stream, or
resting after a bout at tennis on an English lawn,
but for the revolver-lanyards round their strong,
bronzed throats, ending in the butts of Smith and
Wesson’s revolvers of Service calibre, the bandoliers
and belts that lie handy on a table, and the Lee-Metford
carbines that lean in an angle made by the house-wall
and the verandah end. Also, but for the tension
of long-sustained watchfulness on both faces, making
it plain that, though resting and reposeful, they
are neither of them unexpectant of a summons to be
the opposite of these things. It is a look that,
at different degrees of intensity, is stamped on every
face in Gueldersdorp. And the same uncertainty
possesses and pervades even unsentient things.
The Union Jack, hanging listlessly from the summit
of its lofty staff, bathed in the golden, glowing
atmosphere of this January day, may, in an instant’s
space, give place to the red signal of danger; the
bugle, now silent, may at any moment blare out its
loud and dismal note of warning; the bells that call
with peaceful insistence, “Come to church! come
to church!” in the twinkling of an eye may be
clanging scared townsfolk to their burrowed hiding-places.
You never know. For General Brounckers, though
a God-fearing man, sometimes goes in for Sunday gun-practice,
quite unintentionally, as he afterwards explains.
Hence, even on the Sabbath, it is as well to be prepared.
Beauvayse is the first to break the
drowsy silence by knocking the lengthened ash off
his cigar, and expressing his opinion that the weed
might be a worse one.
“Considerin’ the price
the box of fifty was knocked down to me for at Kreils’
auction yesterday,” states Captain Bingo, “it’s
simply smokin’ gold. Nine pound fifteen-and-six
runs me into, how much apiece?” He yawns cavernously,
and gives the calculation up. “Always was
a duffer at figures,” he says, and relapses
into silence until, in the act of throwing the nearly
smoked-out cigar-butt away, he pulls himself up, and,
economically impaling it on his penknife-blade, secures
a few more whiffs.
“Against the Lenten days to
come, when there will be no balm left in Gilead,”
says Beauvayse, cocking a grey-green eye at him in
sleepy derision, “and no tobacco in Gueldersdorp.”
“Kreils’ are sellin’
dashed bad cigarettes at a pound the box of a hundred
now,” says Captain Bingo; “and I’ve
a notion of layin’ in a stock of ’em.
We smoked tea in the Sudan, and I had a shot at hemp,
but it plays the very devil with the nerves.
All jumps and twitches, you know, after a pipe or
two. Nervous as a cat, or a woman. And, talking
of women, I wonder where my wife is?”
He turns a large, pink, disconsolate
face upon Beauvayse. Beauvayse responds with
the air of one who has suffered boredom from the too
frequent enumeration of this conjecture. “Not
knowing, can’t say.” And there is
another silence.
“How she got the maggot into
her head,” presently resumes Lady Hannah’s
spouse, “I can’t think. I did suppose
her vaultin’ ambition to rival Dora Corr woman
who managed to burn her own and a lot of other people’s
fingers by meddlin’ in South African politics
over the Raid business had been quenched
for good that mornin’ you took those fifty chaps
of the Irregulars out for what she would call
their ‘baptism of fire.’”
“That’s newspaperese,”
yawns Beauvayse, his supple brown hands knitted at
the back of his sleek golden head. “Goes
with ‘the tented field’ and casus belli:
cherchez la femme and cui bono?”
“She’s got the lingo at
her finger-ends and in her blood, or we wouldn’t
be cherchaying now,” says Bingo dolorously.
“I asked her if she was particularly keen on
gettin’ killed....”
“Shouldn’t have done that.
Put her on her mettle not to show funk if she felt
it,” mumbles Beauvayse.
A man cant always be diplomatic, grumbles Bingo. Anyhow, shed seen
a bit of a scrap at the outset of affairs, when the B.S.A. went out with the
Armoured Train, and was wild with me for wantin to deprive her of another
glorious experience. ... And next morning she rides out with a Corporal
and two troopers, both chaps beastly sensible of their responsibility, and
wishin her at Cape Town, she in toppin spirits and as keen as mustard.
It was about six oclock, morning, and she hadnt been gone five minutes before
we heard you fellows poundin away and bein pounded at like Jimmy O! I
was on the roof with the Chief, the sweat runnin down into the binoculars,
until the veld seemed swarmin with brown mares and grey linen habits and drab
smasher hats, with my wifes head under em, and hoverin troopers. But I
did make out that your party had got into difficulties
“We opened on ’em at a
thousand yards, and pushed to within five hundred,
and if the fellows in charge of the Hotchkiss could
have got her into play,” Beauvayse interrupts
rather huffily, “we’d have been as right
as rain.”
“Possibly. If I hadn’t
been on special duty that day, and as nervous as a
cat in a thunderstorm, I’d have volunteered to
bring N Troop of A out to the rescue, instead
of Heseltine. As it was, I nearly fell off the
roof when I saw my wife coming, one trooper, as pale
with fright as a piece of soap, supportin’ her
on his saddle, another man leading the mare, dead
lame and the Corporal’s hairy. Plugged in
the upper works, the Corporal, poor beggar! but he’d
managed to stick on somehow until they got to the
Hospital. Have you ever had to deal with a woman
in hysterics?”
Beauvayse nods sagely.
“Once or twice.”
“Once is an experience that
lasts a man all his lifetime. Phew!” Captain
Bingo mops his large pink face. “Never had
such a dressing-down in my life.”
“But what had you to do with the Corporal getting
chipped?”
“The Lord only knows!”
says Bingo piously. “But, if you’d
heard her, all the rest of the day and half through
the night!...”
“I did,” Beauvayse says
with a faint grin. “Mine’s the next
bedroom to yours, you know.”
“‘Oh, the blood!
Oh, the blood!’ ...” Not unsuccessfully
does the spouse of Lady Hannah attempt to render the
recurrent hiccough and the whooping screech of hysteria.
“‘Damn it, my dear!’ I said, tryin’
to reason with her, ‘what else did you expect
the fellow had got in him? Sawdust?’ That
seemed to rouse her like nothing else.... Turned
on me like a tigress, by the living Tinker! called
me everything she could lay her tongue to, and threatened
that she’d apply for a separation if I continued
to outrage every feeling of decency that association
with such a thundering brute hadn’t uprooted
from her nature.”
“Whe ew!”
Beauvayse’s comment is a shrill-toned whistle.
Of course, her nerves were knocked to smithereens, and a man can overlook a
lot, under the circumstances. She was a mere jelly when the bombardment
began ”
goes on rueful Captain Bingo.
“ Rather!”
confirms Beauvayse. Lived in the hotel cellar for the first fortnight, only
emergin from among the beer-barrels and wine-casks and liqueur-cases after dark
“ To blow me up and
forgive me, turn and turn about, until daylight did
appear. Luckily,” reflects Bingo, with a
rather dreary chuckle, “I had plenty of night-duty
on just then, and so escaped a lot.”
“That gave her her chance
to shoot the moon!” hints Beauvayse, in accents
muffled by his long tumbler.
“By the Living Tinker!”
asseverates Captain Bingo, jerked out of his reclining
attitude by vigorous utterance of the expletive, “you
could have bowled me over with a scent-squirter when
I came back to brekker and found her gone, and a cocked-hat
note of farewell left for me on the dressing-table
pincushion, in regular elopement style; and another
for the Chief, sayin’ he read it
to me that she’d gone to retrieve
the Past, with a capital ‘P,’ and hoped
to convince him ere long that one of her despised
sex underlined, ’despised sex’ can
be useful to her country.”
“‘Can be useful to her
country,’” repeats Beauvayse “Question
is, in what way?”
“Damme if I can imagine!”
bursts explosively from the deserted husband.
“All I know up to date, and all you know,
is that before it was quite light she drove out of
our lines in Nixey’s spider, his mouse-coloured
trotter pullin’, and her German maid sittin’
behind, wavin’ a white towel tied to the end
of a walkin’-stick of mine, and went straight
over to the enemy. We hear in the course of things
from a Kaffir despatch-runner that she’s stayin’
in a hotel of sorts at Tweipans, where Brounckers has
had his headquarters since he shifted Chief Laager
from Geitfontein. And for any further information
we may knock our rotten heads against a brick wall
and twiddle our thumbs. Never you marry, Toby,
my boy!”
A V-shaped vein swells and darkens
between the handsome grey-green eyes and on the broad
forehead, white as a girl’s where the sun-tan
leaves off. Beauvayse takes his cigar again from
his mouth, and knocks the ash off deliberately before
he responds:
“Thanks for the advice.”
“Be warned,” says Captain
Bingo sententiously, “by me. Know when you’re
well off, as I didn’t. Take the advice of
your seniors, as I was too pig-headed a fool to do,
and don’t put it in the power of any woman to
make you as rottenly wretched as I am at this minute.”
“Why! women can make
you rottenly wretched,” admits Beauvayse, with
a confirmatory creak of the bamboo chair. “But,
on the other hand, they can make you awfully happy what?”
Captain Bingo throws his long legs
off their resting-place, and sits sideways, staring
rather owlishly at his young friend. He shakes
his head in a dismal way several times, and sucks
hard at his cigar as he shakes it.
For a bit, but does it last? When I came down to hunt you up last June
at the cottage at Cookham
“Look here, old man!”
The bamboo chair creaks angrily as Beauvayse in his
turn sits up and drops his own long legs on either
side of it, and drives the foot-rest back under the
table seat with a vicious punch. “Don’t
remind me of the cottage at Cookham, will you?
It’s one of the things I want to forget just
now.”
“You were as proud as Punch
of it last June. Have you let it?” pursues
Bingo, ignoring his junior’s request.
Beauvayse yawns with ostentatious
weariness of the subject.
“No; I haven’t let it.”
“Ought to go off like smoke,
properly advertised. Somethin’ like this:
’To let, Roselawn Cottage, Cookham: a charmin’
Thames-side bijou residence. Small grounds and
large cellar, a boathouse and a houseboat, stables,
a pigeon-cote, and a private post-box. Duodecimo
oak dinin’-room, boudoir by Rellis. Ideal
nest for a honeymoon, real thing or imitation.
Might have become the real thing if owner hadn’t
been whisked off in time to South Africa.’
And a dashed good job for him. For you’ve
had a decentish lot of narrow escapes, Toby, my boy!”
pursues the oracular Captain Bingo, disregarding his
junior’s forbidding scowl, “and come out
of a goodish few tight places, and you’ve got
out of ’em, if I may say so, more through luck
than wit; but that little entanglement I’m delicately
alludin’ to was one of the closest things on
record in the career of a Prodigal Son.”
“Thanks. You’re uncommonly
complimentary to-day.” Beauvayse pitches
away his cigar, knocks a feather of ash from his clean
silk shirt, and folds his arms resignedly on his broad
flat chest.
“Upon my word, I didn’t
mean to be. Does it ever strike you,” goes
on Captain Bingo doggedly, “that if that wire
from the Chief asking for your address hadn’t
found me at the Club, and if I hadn’t run down
and dug you out at the I won’t repeat
the name of the place, since you don’t seem to
like it you’d have been married and
done for, old chap any date you like to
name between then and the beginning of the war?
And, to put things mildly, there would have been the
mischief to pay with your people.”
“Yes,” Beauvayse agrees
rather dreamily; “there would have been an awful
lot of bother with my people.”
“Not that I object to the stage
myself,” Captain Bingo says, waving a large,
tolerant hand; “and it seems getting to be rather
the fashion to recruit the female ranks of the Peerage
from Musical Comedy, and a prettier and cleverer little
woman than Lessie ... What are you stoppin’
your ears for?”
“I’m not,” says
a muffled, surly voice. “It’s a twinge
of toothache.”
All Ive got to say is, declares Captain Bingo, that marriage with ones
equal in point of breedin is sometimes a blank draw, but marriage with ones
inferior is a howling error. And if you had done as Id stake my best hat
you would have done, supposin youd been left to loll in the lap of the lovely
Lessie
Beauvayse jumps up in a rage.
“Wrynche, how much longer do
you think I can go on listening to this? You’re
simply maundering, man, and my nerves won’t stand
it.”
“Oh, very well! But you
haven’t the ghost of a right to lay claim to
nerves,” Captain Bingo obstinately asseverates.
“Now look at me.”
“I’m hanged if I want
to!” declares Beauvayse. “You’re
not a cheering object.” He drops back into
the bamboo chair again.
“Flyblown, do I look?”
inquires Bingo, with dispassionate interest.
“Well, yes, decidedly,”
Beauvayse agrees, without removing his eyes from the
whitewashed verandah-pillar at which they blankly stare.
Streaky yellow in the whites of the eyes, and pouchy under em? Captain
Bingo demands of his young friend with unmistakable relish. Yes again?
And I grouse and maunder? Of course I do, my dear chap! How can I
help it? A married man who, for all he knows, may be a widower
“I wish to God I knew I was one!”
“My good fellow?”
“You heard what I said,” Beauvayse flings
over his shoulder.
Captain Bingo, his hands upon his
straddling knees, regards his junior with circular
eyes staring out of a large, kind, rather foolish face
of utter consternation.
“That you wished to God you were a widower?”
“Well, I mean it.”